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Resources for processing traumatic births and losses

Sad Teenage Girl

A dear woman contacted me.  15 months after her cesarean, it was still hard for her to read my posts without crying.  This simply broke my heart.  She is not alone.  There are many women who carry the grief and pain of their traumatic vaginal or cesarean births or the loss of their baby.  Every. [...]

Emotional healing from traumatic births

Sad Teenage Girl

So many women are carrying the emotional baggage of their traumatic births. This unprocessed anger and disappointment can negatively impact how future births unfold. Women often feel betrayed and lied to by the medical establishment while simultaneously wondering if their bodies are broken and incapable of birth. [...]

An OB you like or who makes you comfortable isn’t enough

Many women do not interview OBs/midwives when selecting their VBAC care provider.  They either stay with the GYN who has been providing their well-woman care or the same OB who performed their cesarean because they like them.

Women they really believe that if they are good patients, if they are friendly, if they don’t [...]

Coping with miscarriage II

Of all the people coming to this site, it is the women who come searching for information on miscarriage and grief that just really break my heart.  There are so many of us, so I wanted to bring attention to what Candice wrote as well as my response.

Candice left this comment:

My husband and [...]

The emotional & physical pain that cesareans cause

This is a sad post I’m sharing with permission from a new member of the ICAN email support group.  I’m hoping this post will inspire that person who is ‘on the fence’ between VBAC and repeat cesarean to make the extra effort and fight for that VBAC rather than mourn yet another cesarean.

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I [...]

Coping with Miscarriage

I had completely forgotten that I wrote this piece until a month ago.

I was with a dear friend who is getting married and we were visiting with her mom.  We were talking about birth and her mom asked me, "You had a miscarriage, didn’t you?"

The question kind of caught me off guard.  Funny [...]